Ghost

Part of the reason that music is so great is that it's like this bizarre magic that can take thoughts and feelings from the abstract and turn them into physical things. I've heard music that's made me happy, made me sad, made me so angry I could wrestle a bear . . . but one thing I never expected to feel was fear. I mean, there's some creepy bands out there, but they don't scare me. Not so, Ghost. Clad in their black robes and make-up and playing their dark, religious songs, they scare the shit out of me. I mean they awaken a very deep, primeval part of me that wants me to run away and hide. As it is, their music reduces me to cackling madly and twitching a lot. It makes me feel like I'm being watched by things I can't see. This is something I've never experienced before, and I congratulate Ghost on their shattering of my ideas about what it was possible to do with music.

Hailing from Linköping in Sweden, the band - who are known as Ghost B.C. in the US for copyright reasons, but consider the 'B.C.' silent and want it removed - found their roots originally in 2006, when one of the Nameless Ghouls (what the very private band members refer to themselves as to avoid disclosing their identities - incidentally, an alternate name for the band is A Group Of Nameless Ghouls) wrote "probably the most heavy metal riff that has ever existed", which then became the riff in the song Stand By Him. The band formed, but because of having to write their music and organise their very clear image, it was two years before the announcement of their existence became official, and another two before the release of their debut Opus Eponymous.

The image is a very big part of what makes them so creepy. With five of the six band members as faceless hulking black-cloaked figures, more akin to the demons from Raven (or just think Dementors if you're not familiar with early 2000s' CBBC programming) than Catholic monks, each representing one of the natural elements and bearing the alchemic symbol, the focus is on Papa Emeritus II.
Papa Emeritus II is the 'star' of the band, the one the attention is supposed to be focused on, and with his cardinal's robes and skull facepaint - previously just a mask for Papa Emeritus - there's nothing else you can focus on. He draws the eye. Nobody's sure who he is behind the paint, and nobody's sure if Papa Emeritus and Papa Emeritus II (I don't feel right abbreviating the name) are different people or the same person as different incarnations of this character.

Then there's the music itself. Taking even more from the religious ideas that add to their image, with the Latin and the soaring choirs over the guitars and drums. I originally expected Papa Emeritus II's voice to be deep and gravelly and for him to growl a lot, as is somewhat stereotypical of the metal genre, but it's not. It's quite melodic, which makes the songs even weirder. Secular Haze - which is supposed to capture the feeling of drowning in a stormy sea - sounds like an evil circus on drugs, although that's apparently unintentional. The lyrics are crazy;

"The surge of humanity oblivious

To the divine bringingeth light

Let there be night" 

(as an aside: I just had a eureka moment - the 'surge of humanity' is 'oblivious to the divine bringingeth light' because they're in a Secular Haze). There's the Latin stuff as well, like the song title "Per Aspera Ad Inferi", which is "through hardship to Hell". Then, a little more obviously defining the whole Ghost ideology, are the lyrics from Year Zero, sung by a terrifying choir.

"Belial, Behemoth, Beelzebub, Asmodeus, Satanas, Lucifer . . .

Hail Satan, Archangelo 
Hail Satan, Welcome year zero 
Hail Satan, Archangelo Hail Satan, Welcome year zero"

For those of you not up on your Old Testament: the six names at the start are, respectively, a demon, a massive chaos monster, one of the seven princes of Hell, the demon of lust, erm . . . Satan, and early-days Satan. I'm not sure how much clearer things could possibly be at this point.

Anyway, I digress - but only because I find the thought that's gone into what Ghost does absolutely fascinating.

Their newest album, Infestissumam ("the most hostile", referring to, obviously, the Antichrist), was released earlier this year, although it suffered slight difficulties getting their album artwork done in the U.S. - although, really, what else can you expect when you confront such a conservative country with a band who tried to get their singer elected as Pope and who casually reference the Antichrist.

Really, though, they're terrifying, but brilliant. It brings to mind Ollivander from the Harry Potter books; "He did great things. Terrible, yes . . . but great." I can't stop trying to find people who I think I can get to listen to them. I really am not sure if they're just a group of very mysterious Swedish people or actually some kind of demon vanguard sent to organise some uprising amongst the human masses and open a pit to Hell. I can't even tell if the reason why I'm obsessing so much over them is purely because they're actually amazing, or because they've got someone singing "Kisum råv pök" in the background or something.

Listen to themmmmmmmm.